4 min read
PREGNANCY & BODY IMAGE
Embracing her sexuality and body is something that has always come naturally to Caroline Vreeland. She chats with A Pea in the Pod editor, Callan, on her experience with it during & after baby—plus how having her son has changed her for the better.
Callan Russo (CR): What was your favorite part about being pregnant?
Caroline Vreeland (CV):I had been a free spirit and a little wild, especially when I met my husband. We were in such a seduction phase. We were travelling and going out and living, as much as we could during these past few years. And I think being pregnant…it sobered me up. It made me realize my priorities. [Pre-pregnancy,] I loved showing up with a suitcase and just saying, Fuck it, I'm in Berlin, let's make it happen. I think being pregnant really helped instill a sense of routine for me that I had never known before.
I just met my husband two and a half years ago. We got married. I moved to Canada. We got pregnant. We did everything quickly, and it felt really good to put roots down. I was always the person that could up and go anywhere, focus on where the next job was, and now I feel like there's a foundation being built. I think about having assets and saving money. It just feels exciting. Now that I have this guy, he depends solely on us. It's inspiring to have that new side of me. I was a little bit wild before, and now I have this motherly instinct, and it started growing right when I got pregnant.
CR: The mental shift of being an individual to becoming a mom is just crazy.
CV:Yeah, little dramas that you used to be involved in or care about are just so unimportant. It’s a little daunting. It's a little intimidating, but it's exciting.
CR: It seems like you very much embraced your pregnant body. What was that journey like watching your body change? How did you feel about it then versus now being postpartum?
CV:I loved having my belly, I loved the feeling of it. Of course, you become lethargic and it becomes challenging, but I was doing all the content, let me tell you. I was doing lingerie and stuff, and I was loving that. What do you think happens after all the sexy stuff goes on? That’s how you make a baby. I didn't shy away from still being my sensual self. I like to see my body change, and I really felt powerful. And afterwards, things are good.
I like [the belly]. It’s a little protruding and it's going to take time to go down. But it’s kind of comforting in a way, and he likes to sit on it. It's nice for him. But to me, I’m just so in awe of how the whole body works together, and when he cries, I can feel it in my nipples, or when Nico was kind to me during labor, the oxytocin would flow… shit like that blows my mind.
I don't get hung up on "bouncing back” immediately. I just did a job for the vitamins that I've been taking and my favorite picture was the one where it shows that I still have a little bit of a belly, because that's normal. That's exactly what’s supposed to be happening. Nico's always telling me that I still look sexy, so that doesn't hurt.
CR: I love it. Can you tell us more about embracing your sexuality while pregnant?
CV:I just felt sexy. I didn't feel gross. I definitely felt heavy and slow and tired and farting and peeing, but I didn't feel any less sexy. I felt like Nico was a little afraid—he was doing that thing of being afraid to poke the baby [during sex]. I had to tell him, like, there's the mucus plug. I was fascinated by the mucus plug. To be honest it's hard to do it because you can only lay on the side. Maybe there's more creative ways.
I felt very supported because if my libido was not as high as it was before, my partner would never hold me to that. I didn't feel pressured. I didn't feel like I had to keep up this crazy libido that I always had. I definitely still felt sexy. I'll just put it this way, I'm very eager to get going again. How long do I have to wait?
CR: I don't know! I had a C-section, so I was a little different.
CV:You were back in the saddle. Well, not back, but your vagina is perfect, is what you're trying to tell me.
READ MORE FROM CAROLINE ABOUT BREASTFEEDING AND POSTPARTUM IN PART 2